a letter to gentlemen

gentlemen,

I know many of you are confused by us women, and i totally understand that. i do. you hear us constantly complain about how we want a good man and then when we sleep with you on the first date you think….”well that was easy, how many other men has she just given it to like that?” and honestly…that is a really good question to have. we as women give you what you want so often that you don’t feel the need to treat us special. especially if she has been hurt in the past. and some of us have been hurt a lot. 

a lot of us wonder when will men realize that all a single woman wants is a man who wants to get to know her. wants you to care about her likes and dislike. wants you to simply talk to her. and not to get mad when she automatically assumes that you want in her pants when she has encountered men like so much in her life that it has caused her to put a wall up to protect herself from “hit and run” men.

all she wants is for you to please accept that she is a little scared and reluctant at first. and know that if you can show her you care and make her feel safe she will give you the true desires of your heart and share her heart with you.

She may come off a little crazy and battered at first but stick with her and you might be surprised of the love that she can give you. 

and maybe…just maybe don’t make a move. even if she seems like all she wants is you. don’t do it. focus on that tiny question in the back of your mind, “how many men has she given it up to?” I know you think that at some point during the act…at least i hope you do. because HIV is real. STD’s are real and they can really kill you. Even if you use a condom. You don’t know what’s in her mouth or if there’s an open sore. 

some girls are damaged from bad men and some men are damaged from bad women. all in all we just want to be loved.

….and loved honestly.

 

*and men…if you have any comments PLEASE leave them! I would love to hear your side of things…and so would SO many women :).

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single girl in 2013.

This one is for the ladies!! my single sistahs!

get you a glass of wine and a blanket because i’m about to unleash the true feelings in your lonely single hearts.

I have been single most of my life. like im talking about out of the 22 years ive been on  this planet ive been single for 21 years and 11 months. And some of you are like…bull shit! but no…i’m very serious. now yes I have had men who took me on dates and ive made out with few of them but never have i said to someone that I meet. “This is my boyfriend _____”.  and in all honesty…its all i want.

now some of you are like fuck men im I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T! and ive said that to plenty of people but when  you go home at night to your one bedroom house and open that bottle of wine and play Adele and cry while watching The Notebook and eating Turtles you know that you are just saying that. (also…don’t act like im the only one who has done this).

and you cant help but think to yourself…what am i doing wrong? why wont a man fall in love with me? am i too fat? too skinny? my ass not big enough? my boobs too small? too big? can they see that i forced myself into these jeans? maybe i just don’t deserve someone right now.

 

STOP IT! JUST STOP PUTTING YOURSELF DOWN!

Put the Ben and Jerry’s down and pause the TV and log out of of POF, OkCupid, and Twine!

I know if your like me then your 22 years old and your best friend is a gay guy that you share all your secrets with and he is the one who constantly has to tell you “you’re beautiful” “fuck men” “they don’t deserve someone as awesome as you”. and you look at them and you’re like…”yeah” but in your head you’re screaming….

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MQLd3ELuqtQ

people just don’t understand how difficult it is to be single. how hard it is to have so much love inside of you that you just want to give and you end up giving it to the wrong person or the man who doesn’t deserve it. and will just use you and that you will be embarrassed to be with. a man who will just take and take from you and you’re so afraid of being alone that you stay with him until you just cant stand it anymore and would rather get a root canal with no anesthesia than spend another five seconds with this man. and when you finally have the balls to end it you find yourself drunk texting him at 5:00 am asking him to “just love you”. and you wake up the next morning feeling cheap and used. I have seen this story so many time from so many different women and WE ARE WORTH SO MUCH MORE.

Now onto my gays…I love you very very very much you are some of the greatest men that I have ever met and you go through so much so please remember that while I write this next part of the blog….

I literally can not handle another guy i liking turning out to be gay! i will literally drink a bottle of hydrogen peroxide if it happens to me again. I mean the first 10 times i was understanding but now im just like

image2

I have invested so much into men that act straight, look straight, seem like they like women only to be SLAPPED IN THE FACE WHEN I FIND OUT THEY ARE GAY! I’m not saying that all gay men should be forced to wear a jacket saying “im gay” but it would be nice to give us SOME KIND OF HINT! my little heart cant take much more of the “Surprise! Im gay!” I just cant do it anymore…and no i dont need any more gusbands! I have mt my quota for this lifetime.

I know that love will find us but until then know that wine isn’t going anywhere and that you will always have the internet to understand your life.

http://www.buzzfeed.com/ashleyperez/24-things-single-people-are-tired-of-hearing

until then…remember always love honestly.